Meltdown

24 02 2010

Mr C just left for work and I found it so far to keep smiling. I wanted to cry and ask him to stay but I can’t. He has an important job to do and he needs to go and do it. It is just that I have no idea what is wrong with Piran and I am low on sleep and energy and just any kind of mental strength at all.

I thought Piran had a bug on Monday – he threw up his first bottle of the day (8oz milk in full geyser  effect. It just kept coming and coming.) Then there was a sucession of bad dirty nappies and much sleeping on mummy’s lap. I knew he was ill because he was so still, he never lets me cuddle him usually. He looked so pale and sad. My poor baby. In the evening he developed a temperature and we called NHS Direct for advice. They were fabulous as usual and told us to give him milk and food, little and often.

So it is now Wednesday morning. Piran was only sick once yesterday – when Mr C gave him his first bottle of the morning – luckily only a couple of ounces. Then there was much of the same yesterday – he will drink 4oz milk at a time, and keep it down. He refuses any kind of food, whether finger foods or puree / yoghurt either fed to him or on a pre loaded spoon. The weaning was beoming a strain before all this started anyway. Baby led weaning is really HARD (that needs a post all of its own!)

We are back to the rhythms of a new baby. Offering food at regular intervals, him sleeping on my lap, his bedtimes all mixed up. Starting the day earlier and earlier (5am this morning *yawn*). Three changes of clothes a day, usually for both of us. The washing machine on constantly. One person eating their dinner while the other holds the baby then switching. Being up 2, 3 times in the night. I feel like I am losing my mind, it is completely crazy. How quickly you forget what this was like.

I just feel so useless, I have no idea what I am doing. I know to make sure that he has a wet nappy every couple of hours, and I am happy that he is not dehydrated because it is only that one bottle, first thing in the morning that we give him that comes shooting back up. I just don’t understand what is going on. I miss my baby’s smiles, they have been few and far between this week – something to be remarked on, rather than the norm. It  must be horrible to be sick at that age, so scary and hard to understand. I wish I could tell what he wants or needs, I wish he could tell me.

I am waiting until 8.30 and then I will call the doctor and see if I can take him in today, just to be sure he is okay. I just want him to get better, my poor little man.

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11 responses

24 02 2010
TheMadHouse

Oh Kelly. I couldnt run and leave such a wrenching post. When they are little they do regress when ill, it seems to be part of their coping mechanism. If you are worried then NHS dreict of GP everytime. Dont let them make you feel bad, you are Pirans mum and you know him best. There is a nasty virus going round, we all have it, so I do sympathise

24 02 2010
littledude's mummy

Oh it sucks :(Can totally relate to feeling useless – and going loopy on account of suddenly feeling like you've got a newborn all over again :(We seem to be finally coming out the other side, but these last 5 days have been horrible, I totally sympathise.Best advice I can give, is just give him all the cuddles he wants – it was the only thing I felt I could do for D.Hope your little man is better really soon xxx

24 02 2010
The Dotterel

You're doing the right thing, Kelly. Call the doctor; get him seen. It can never do any harm. But as TMH says they do regress, and the sleep/lack of response is just the way they recover. It sounds, from what you say, as if he's over the worst but if I was you I'd be doing exactly the same thing.

24 02 2010
Mum with carrot in her hair

You poor thing. I really hope you get sorted out at the doctors. Its so hard when they're poorly as you want so much to help them but don't know what to do for the best. Hope things get back to normal again for you soon and hope little man is on the road to recovery.

24 02 2010
RebaMc

Hang on in there, you'll both get through it 🙂 It's so frustrating when they can't tell you what's wrong. Hope the little guy's feeling better soon. x

24 02 2010
amberlife

My granddaughter had a very similar bug a couple of weeks ago and was looking very unlike her usual sunny self. She's as right as rain now. Keep your chin up – he'll be fine! xx

24 02 2010
Lorraine

Oh Kelly , poor you nad poor Piran, its so horrible when they are ill like that, too little to tell you the problem that is making them so miserable. Hope you get to see the doctor and that Piran is much better soon.. hugs to you both.x

24 02 2010
PhotoPuddle

Oh hun, Just wanted to give you a virtual hug. It's probably just a little bug. All babies get them. It never gets any easier though does it? Every time they are ill it's the worst thing in the world. He will get better soon though honestly. I'd definitely see a doctor though just to put your mind at rest.

24 02 2010
Heather

oh sweetheart, i hope he gets better soon. I feel for you, it is awful when they are sick, you feel so helpless, so useless. Thinking of you.

25 02 2010
SnafflesMummy

HOpe Piran starts to feel better soon and that you can catch up on some sleep while he does. Its so awful to se them ill at any time but even harder when they are still so little.

3 03 2010
Muddling Along Mummy

I hope he gets better soon – have you seen the GP ?You're doing a great job – honestly

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